The end of an era
Break-ups suck. We have all been there. No one likes it when their relationship comes to an end, but it‘s a fact of life. If there was a pill to swallow to ease the pain and send the feeling of desperation away, it would be perfect, but there isn't. Everybody has been at least once in their life going on a rough patch. The only option you have when dealing with a bad break-up is time and patience.
It is very important not to develop a negative outlook on life (easier said than done, of course). Dwelling on the past is pointless. The sooner you realize that the relationship was doomed and it has ended for good, the sooner you will begin to value things that really matter and move on with your life.
Fortunately, there are some steps that won't help erase the memories or heal the pain with a magic stick, but would certainly ease your suffering, help you not lose your mind, and get through this nasty period like a grown person.
Give yourself time to get used to idea of being single again.
Let yourself grieve. It is natural to cry and be upset because your relationship has ended. Your friends and relatives may tell you that it is useless to waste time mourning instead getting on with your life as soon as possible. Well, that is not necessarily true. One will never be able to move on, unless they give themselves some time to grieve over the past relationship. Let the tears come out. Ask to take a few days off so you can stay at home and let yourself be miserable. Lie in bed until late in the afternoon, watch TV, eat whatever you like, let your emotions come out. Crying and grieving actually relieves pain and make you calm.
Conquer fear and anxiety
Don't let the grieving period last too long. A few days are fine. Then go back to work. It would be good for you to start making some plans for the future, thinking "what next?". A relationship has ended but life goes on. It is not the end of the world, even though it may seem quite like it. After grieve come anxiety and fear of loneliness. There will be many negative thoughts messing with your mind, don't let them control your emotions and cloud your thinking. Push the negativity s away and conquer your fears. Fear can be very dangerous. It can cause panic attacks, emotional breakdown and long-term depression. Make sure you never make fear your friend.
Get out, hang around with a bunch of friends
Surround yourself with people you enjoy being with. The best way to fight loneliness is to go out a lot and stick to a group of friends. When people surround you, the last thing you will think of is loneliness and anxiety. If you still feel lonely and depressed, invite some friends to come to your apartment and live with you for a while. Ladies might invite friends for dinner to watch some romcoms. Guys, on the other hand, might gather to watch a football game drinking beer, play video games or do whatever brings joy. If you have a powerful urge to get drunk don’t do it alone. Go out with friends, party around and drink booze altogether. This would be so much fun.
Try to stay as busy as you can
This is the most important step if you want to survive a bad break-up. Although you will probably want to stay at home, lying in bed and do meaningless things, you would do a lot better if you invite some changes in your life. Why not start a new exercising routine or initiate a new hobby - something you have always wanted but never had time before to concentrate on. Now is the time. Adopt a new fitness regime. You will feel a lot better and relaxed after a daily workout. Not only it will help you perfect your appearance, but it will improve your health. Exercising is good for your health on so many levels than sitting on the sofa eating chips.
Another useful way to keep yourself together is to embark on a large working projects that will absorbe most of yuor time. Indeed, work does help when one is trying to recover from a bad break-up.
Be careful with social media
Keep your break-up to you. This is too personal to share with the public. Avoid posting details about your private status on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr or Instagram. It is totally ok to let yourself grieve but don't share your sadness on the Internet. It is embarrassing.
Block your ex-partner from all social media profiles and never intend to write him or her. As we live in the social media age, it makes it hard to forget someone you have been close to, when Facebook and Instagram keep reminding you of them, how are they doing, how their life has changed for good. You imagine them in tears, wallowing with despair, and suddenyl they appear so happy and having great time on the newly-uploaded photos on the Web, it could be traumatizing. Therefore, cut contact with the ex in all the possible ways. This is very important, especially during the first months after the break-up. Also, avoid posting relationship-related quotes of wisdom on Twitter or Facebook. There is no need for that. However, you are free to share your concerns and anxiety with friends but only do it in person not on social media.
The end of a long-term relationship marks the beginning of an unpleasant period. Once you were feeling loved and safe in a harmonious relationship, the next time you turn around, you sit in your apartment alone with tears in the eyes; feeling like someone has stabbed you with a knife straight to the heart. Break-ups can be really tough to handle, especially if you have been together with your ex-partner for a very long time.
